Saying ‘no’.

I am not one of those people to say ‘Yes’ to everything.  The problem I encounter is saying no to myself.  Sometimes I can get so caught up with doing the things that I think need to be done and then I forget about the things I want to get done.

For example some days I can spend the whole day doing housework without resting or taking time out to recharge.  This is my saying ‘no’ problem.

I am going to try to work on keeping a good pace when it comes to housework and looking after the family.  If I fall apart then the rest of the family suffers.

Being organised helps with this problem.  When I say being organised I mean preparing meals ahead of time and freezing them to make sure that there are emergency meals on hand for when I am unwell, or want to take some time out to rest or recharge.

Also doing things over the course of the week in smaller doses, rather then having to achieve it all at once helps too.

I am aware of the power of 15 minutes.  I like to get up and work for 15 minutes and then rest for 15 minutes.  I find that I get so much more done when I am not trying to achieve everything at once.

Samantha, fantastic insights – good for recognising that the person you most have trouble saying no to is YOU!

I also love how you know that if you’re not okay and taken care of, your family will also suffer.

Go easy on yourself and say no more

Ah, saying no… quite a program for this week, isn’t it?

Well, to me saying no is something quite difficult to do.

Not because I can’t say no, but because I don’t say it in a good way.

I’m very strong-minded and I have a sharp tongue, and if I don’t pay attention I can be very rude. Knowing that, I was especially interested into the tips that Marcia would give in this week’s lesson about how to say no in an effective and good way.

Strangely, “NO” can be very positive and “yes” can be negative: “When you say yes to one thing, you always say no to something else”, says Marcia.

And the opposite is true. Saying no to something that isn’t aligned with the life your pursue is saying yes to your true goals and aspirations.

The things I want to say no to are the following:

• accepting extra work that isn’t my responsability, especially when there is nothing good in return,
• tolerating when someone is unfair and disrespectful to my work and, consequently, to me,
• doing extra work without even being asked to.

Once again, the professional area is the one I’ll be focusing on, as I feel respected in my private life.

What I liked most about this week’s lesson is that the last page focus on enjoying life. It helps realising that, when you say no to some unimportant, negative, useless things, you have more time, more energy and more life to spend doing important, positive things, that make you grow and feel happy.

The next month will be extremely busy at work, and we’ll have an infertility treatment right after that (frozen embryo transfer), so needless to say that it’ll be a stressful time.

Remembering to enjoy life will be more important than ever, and I’ve already scheduled some fun events: a maternity photo session with a pregnant friend of mine, some pages I want to scrap, a lunch with my friends.

All those steps will make the stressful period easier to go through.

Take care!
Chloe

Hi, Marcia here

Chloe, I love how you’ve already scheduled lots of fun events to keep you focussed and looking forward. Fantastic!!!

(you’ll see exactly why when you read tomorrow’s newsletter )

All the best with your FET and with saying no to things you want less of in your life.

Over to you – how easy is it for you to say no?

PS Sam’s had sick kiddos and will be back once they’re healthy again

Success in life requires a short “Yes” list, and a long “No” list. – Gary Ryan Blair

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Whenever I coach time management clients, one of the first things I tell them is this:

You ALWAYS say no to at least one thing when you say yes to something else.

For example…

• if you say yes to volunteering on 3 committees, you’re saying no to one or all of the following: your family, your self-care, your exercise time, your household…
• if you say yes to that beautiful new pair of shoes you really can’t afford, you’re saying no to your debt-reduction plan!
• if you say yes to having an absolutely spotless home all the time, chances are you’re saying no to fun times playing with your kids on the floor

No is such a small word but is often so hard to say.

Why should you say no?

1. it helps you set firm boundaries
2. it helps you honour your values
3. it makes you more productive
4. it reduces your stress
5. it frees you to serve where you’re called to with joy

This week, I’m challenging you to SLOW DOWN and think carefully before you say yes to anything.

In fact, when next someone asks you to do something or attend an event, why don’t you start by saying, “let me get back to you on that” so you can think clearly about the situation before committing yourself.

On a scale of one to ten, how easy is it for you to say no?

For me, I’d say about an 8 or 9, depending on who I’m talking to

P.S. Learning to say no is one of the key principles of effective time management. I need more time will help you if this is one of your frustrations.

Success in life requires a short “Yes” list, and a long “No” list. – Gary Ryan Blair
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Whenever I coach time management clients, one of the first things I tell them is this:

You are ALWAYS saying no to something when you say yes to something else.

For example…

• if you say yes to volunteering on 3 committees, you’re saying no to one or all of the following: your family, your self-care, your exercise time, your household…
• if you say yes to that beautiful new pair of shoes you really can’t afford, you’re saying no to your debt-reduction plan – ouch!

It’s such a small word but is often so hard to say.

Why should you say no?

1. it helps you set firm boundaries
2. it helps you honour your values
3. it makes you more productive
4. it reduces your stress
5. it frees you to serve where you’re called to with joy

This week, I’m challenging you to SLOW DOWN and think carefully before you say yes to anything.

In fact, why don’t you start saying, “let me get back to you on that” so you think clearly about the situation before committing yourself.

Do you have any questions or comments?
Send me an email and I’ll get back to you!

Have a great week!

Love
Marcia

P.S. Remember the contest on the main page of my blog. You can win a $25 stacks and stacks gift voucher if you blog about my new Organise your Home e-course